thinking

i've been thinking about this post for days. there's no way i could encompass everything i wanted to say and ignore, and squeeze it into anything readable.

i was driving through the towns i've come to love, the rain spattering in small bursts on the windows, and i kept thinking about how i've come to view new england winters with awe. i never lived here before this time of my life, and while we all hear stories about the majesty and breathtaking beauty of it, and i've watched it and lived it now for a bit, i never stopped to live *in* it, other than the obvious dealing with it. children love snow - they live fully, wholly, in their igloos and snowfights and slippery driveways and every single second of it is important. they don't think about the cost of snowsuits and replaced mittens and ice chippers and snow blowers - they wake up and count the snowflakes stuck to the windows and how long it'll take until they're out in it.

i'm not going to worry about what it will take to make this work. i'm going to enjoy the fact that i'm doing it, instead. what i'm leaving behind was good. it was. and i'm forever grateful to the person i was then for letting me get here, now.

"every time god closes a door, somewhere he opens a window."

-the sound of music