off leash

not exactly. that's never the case. i suppose it's more like "longer leash" rather than off.

my owner is gone for a few days. sort of planned, but some unexpected changes. we've been almost constantly together for almost three weeks, and it feels very strange to be alone again. i went out to do errands, forgot my cell phone, and realized i was out of touch for the first, longest time since we met. i felt lost. i felt a little panicky, and my agoraphobic tendencies tried to take over, but instead i finished what i was doing and calmly set out for home as soon as possible. i had a long list of chores waiting for me when i got there, so i managed to keep everything choked down successfully. a little wood stacking, a little lunch, a little sweeping (i swear, my new name should be cinderella), and it feels a lot better.

i had not anticipated the utter isolation.

i don't have a lot of friends these days. the few i had that i was geographically close to are now, obviously, not, and the few others i have that are close to my heart were never living nearby anyway. once in a while i talk to them on the phone. i'm usually too goddamned busy to spend much time on the internet, either, and anyway, the satellite system goes down pretty regularly. we live so far from our closest neighbours that it's not like i'm seeing anyone at all very much.

but i'm not lonely. not yet. and i don't plan on being lonely. i have so much on my plate, so much to think about and physical activities to take care of that i had briefly thought about settling in for some tea and an old movie (no television here in the sticks) and remembered the other chores that needed to get done before the sun went down. these few moments recording this spot in time are all the free time i'm going to get today.

i think i want to nickname my new home "oz". he's the wizard. i'm dorothy. it's very much like the '40's.

(that's not meant to imply my owner is some weird hairy short guy behind a curtain hemming and hawing about the truth. not so. more like the fiery god-like wizard dorothy initially meets. you know. the scary one.)