Thursday, November 1, 2007

jealous. jealous again.

"...Somebody bring me some water
Can't you see its out of control
Baby's got my heart and my baby's got my mind
But tonight the sweet devil's got my soul..."

-Melissa Etheridge

it stabbed me, quick and deep, and then was gone.

but the thing is, i wanted it back again, that sensation that brings me out of my muted self, the feeling that makes me gasp for air like something alive again.

yes, i use her for my own purposes. and i'll take the jealousy, because it's one of those things that makes me remember that i am alive, that being alive involves pain sometimes. sweet stinging - it's no different than a whip.

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